Why do we need to have a name ?

Why do we need to have a name ? To remember a life? To reference an experience? To mark a loss? To recognize a death? To start healing?

You have had a miscarriage. But your baby isn't a miscarriage. Your baby is a member of your family. It has been said that every life has value and every life makes a contribution to the world and a name gives truth to that. Everyone deserves a name because every life is valuable, every life deserves recognition.

The experience of knowing you are pregnant with child changes you. Giving name to that which was a catalyst of change and transformation in your life can help to identify the meaning and blessings you received by knowing your little one for however amount of time you had with them. A name is beneficial in helping to move through the many waves of emotions and recognize your experience for what it is.

Anybody who has experienced miscarriage knows that it matters. But we also know from Family Constellations Therapy, for example, that unacknowledged miscarriages can come to be represented by other children in the family. It is as if siblings are left to carry the burden of unexpressed grief. There was also a study by a student at Yale University, that couples who named there miscarried children increased their probability of having a healthy pregnancy the next time around. Perhaps Without a reflection and remembrance we somehow re-create a similar experience.